The Doctor Who Real Time Marathon: Timelash

Timelash: Part One (09/03/25)

Well, that was marginally better than The Two Doctors on some levels but seemed fairly similar to Vengeance On Varos. Not that repetitive ideas are anything new to the series (just look at Seasons 5 and 13) but again we're on an alien planet where the citizens are held under an oppressive regime and everyone (all 500 of them!) seems to live in a citadel in an otherwise barren landscape. This time, at least, we see a few more of the locals, but our leading couple seem just as wooden as Jondar and Areta, and their (newly appointed) Leader (or Maylin) is played by Blake's 7's Paul Darrow with the air of a ham Shakespearean actor. I wonder if the next story will feature Sally Knyvette or Gareth Thomas?

The episode got off to a decent start with three rebels trying to flee capture and failing. The leader was caught and taken to see the Borad, the planet's actual leader; a seemingly mutated (judging by his right hand) dictator hiding behind the guise of an old man who only appears on a screen. I'd say it's his true face except for the fact that during face to face encounters his voice is different. Also, both Aram and the ill-fated Maylin Ranis didn't seem to recognise him as the Borad just before he killed them. Anyhow, the other two rebels were thrown into the eponymous Timelash, which is a 'Kontron Tunnel' traversing time and space and ending up who-knows-where! Probably 12th Century Earth, since that's where the Doctor pinpointed its other end when the TARDIS got caught in it. It's a massive shame as the three rebels seemed to be the most interesting characters in the episode, and it's particularly sad that they lasted only ten minutes since Aram was played by Christine Kavanagh from Stephen Gallagher's Chimera, and the younger rebel by Steven Mackintosh from The Muppet Christmas Carol, Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels and The Buddha Of Suburbia! 

But enough of who we didn't see enough of and on to those we did. Rebels aside, the episode started with an extremely tedious scene in the TARDIS with more bickering between the Doctor and Peri. We're approaching the end of the season and, if anything, these scenes have got worse! What with Peri's petulant whining and the Doctor's bombastic bolshiness ("Bad? BAD?? BAD???") this felt like a huge step backwards to their relationship in Colin's debut. Surely the script editor should be keeping an eye on the progression of their partnership and be making sure it settles down over time? These scenes leave little believability to Peri wanting to continue travelling in the TARDIS, nor for the Doctor to want her around - as was briefly touched upon here but not given any depth. Or are these scenes additions by Eric Saward to add 'characterisation' that a writer new to the series (as here) missed? Because their interactions later on Karfel, especially after Peri had her Saint Christopher confiscated by one of the planet's rather marvellously realised android servants, felt much more amicable and measured.

Prior to their arrival, Maylin Ranis had been executed for conspiring with his future son-in-law, Mykros, against the Borad. Mykros, in turn, was to be thrown into the Timelash but informed Ranis' daughter, Vena, that the Borad's power was held in the Maylin's amulet, now worn by Maylin Tekker (Paul Darrow) so she snatched it and threatened to throw it into the Timelash, only to be knocked in herself. From here she floated through the TARDIS to Scotland in 1885 where she encountered a young student/soon-to-be-teacher called Herbert who believed he'd summoned her with his Ouija Board. I actually quite like Herbert, but more of him later. 

Apparently, the Doctor has been the Karfel before, with Jo Grant, and saved the planet's people from some undisclosed disaster. While Peri went on a tour of the citadel, having been handed a mysterious note by one of the rebels, the Doctor was enlisted by Tekker to retrieve Vena. It was Tekker's rather stupid plan to hold Peri ransom so the Doctor would cooperate but Peri escaped and got menaced by something called a Morlox (which seems to be the head and neck of a Diplodocus sticking out a cave wall - exactly how they expected Nicola to convincingly act opposite the thing is anyone's guess!), until she was rescued by the rebels who showed her a photo of Jo to get proof she really was with the Doctor; lucky he'd recently been showing her his photo album whilst, it seems, regaling her with his adventures during Resurrection Of The Daleks! However, Peri had dropped the note which said where the rebel hideout was and guards turned up and arrested everyone.

Not knowing any of this, the Doctor followed Vena to Scotland and persuaded her to return with him. These were possibly the most entertaining bits of the episode, despite JeanAnne Crawley's rather stylised acting, and David Chandler came across as quite endearing as Herbert, the naïve young academic taking a holiday by a Loch. It was quite a relief when he stowed away in the TARDIS for the return journey to Karfel, and I sort of hope he's kept on as a companion because he gives off Harry vibes, and the current Doctor and Peri could certainly do with a character like that to temper the antagonism.

Anyhow, in a prescient mirroring of current world events, Trum... er, Tekker seems intent on starting a war with Karfel's former allies, the puppet-like Bandrils and, having retrieved the amulet, had the rebels lined up to be thrown into the Timelash, starting with the Doctor. No sign of Peri, though. All in all, this was all fairly run of the mill and, so far, another barely-making-it-to-average episode. The writing and diversity this year is very poor in comparison to Season 21, despite them throwing Cybermen, the Master, Sontarans, Lytton, the Second Doctor and Jamie into the mix with even a sequel to nearly every 60s Cyberman story kicking things off! Maybe if the production team had focused more on the quality of the writing rather than persuading us that this was still the Doctor by constantly throwing references to the show's past at us, I'd feel more positive about all this. But so far, Colin and Nicola have been given very little to work with and much to work against!

Timelash: Part Two (16/03/25)

Well, that wasn't bad. It wasn't great, but it was better than the last story! There were some interesting ideas in there, especially the Doctor's use of the Kontron crystals from inside the Timelash to project an image of himself into the future in order to defeat the Borad. And Colin was very good! I think this was his best performance so far - he's certainly settled into the role and (after the awkward bits of bombast last week) was very much recognisable as the Doctor we've been following for the last 20-odd years.

Alas, this was probably Peri's worst outing yet, but given that she was given bugger all to do except be chained up and scream before being rescued, abandoned, then grabbed by the Borad in a bit of a weird extra stand-off at the end, I don't know what more Nicola could have done. The actress playing Vena was pretty terrible throughout, and Paul Darrow continued to chew the scenery right up until his rather abrupt demise, at which point he chose to do some decent acting for his final lines. And the Borad was very good! For The Two Doctors we got warts and ginger wigs, and Sontarans with wonky latex heads. Here we got a rather wonderful prosthetic of a Morlox face covering half of actor Robert Ashby's head, blended nicely into his own features, and a not too shabby flipper. I have to admit it was impressive. Pity the actual Morlox puppet, much like the Bandril, was such a let down.

We had a repeat of last week with a Morlox menacing Peri, this time so she could mutate into the Borad's mate. Christ, she was feeble! I really do feel sorry for Nicola; she gets next to nothing to do and had a really good start facing off against the Master in her debut. Now all she does is whine and need rescuing! She's by far the weakest companion since Sarah Jane and treads a similar path and Victoria by being vocally quite forthright but otherwise fairly useless. You'd think by now they'd be able to write a female lead more progressively! I guess it's just an example of how influential all the mid-80s slasher films were in popular culture with the lead actresses constantly in jeopardy and being molested by the main monster whilst wearing next to nothing. Incidentally, Peri's finally got a decent outfit which was neither revealing nor Lycra! A burgundy, long-sleeve trouser suit (of sorts) that really suited her.

We also had a female leader for the rebels, Katz, who didn't have a great deal to do, but then none of them did. And on top of this the incidental music was also composed by a woman! Is this the first time this has happened?* Liz Parker did a pretty decent job of it, too. Hopefully, we'll hear more of her in the future.

Despite me being relatively positive about this story, as with most of the episodes this season there seemed to be a lot of padding. For example, with the Bandrils firing a warhead at Karfel, the Doctor rushed off to save the day, then had an extended chat with Peri about why she couldn't go with him, followed by another extended chat (albeit amusing at points) with Herbert about why he'd been foolish to stow aboard the TARDIS again - the Doctor was going on a possible suicide mission. Turns out it wasn't, obviously, but the episode did slow to a crawl when it should have been cranking up the tension.

Oh, and Herbert (would you believe?) was a young H.G. Wells! I'm sure if I look back there will be references to his novels throughout the script - Vena for one and the Morlox for another, both being from The Time Machine. The episode ended with the revelation and Herbert joining the Doctor and Peri for the journey back to Scotland. Am I wrong to hope he sticks around for another story?

Well, as with every episode this year, it's been a mixed bag, but I enjoyed this more than most and I think that's largely down to the tone of the episode and Colin's performance. Only a couple of weeks left now. I feel I should have warmed to the new Doctor a lot sooner and I feel the fact I hadn't is entirely down to the writing. Given the right material Colin excels, but the production team seem far too intent on throwing in unnecessary outbursts and excessively flowery language ("You microcephalic apostate!") which hobble his performance. In this story he had the opportunity to deliver a much more nuanced portrayal, on occasion, which felt more in line with his predecessors and as such lifted the production above some of the rest of this season's offerings. Better late than never, I suppose!